Archive for the ‘Stupid Bullshit’ Category

I so want a button like that that makes things explode. Incidentally, I have FIOS, and it is indeed…AWESOME!

If you haven’t heard anything about the hot water the creators of South Park are in, then take a look at this. To put it in a nutshell: Round 1…Last season, South Park had an unforgettable episode about Scientology featuring Tom Cruise in a closet with Nicole Kidman urging him to come out. This angered Tom Cruise, who is quite known for being angry about such things and thus super-vindictive. The episode was supposed to be re-aired a few weeks ago; however, rumor has it Tom Cruise threatened to pull MI3 adverts if the episode was aired. The episode was not aired. Round 2…Because of offenses taken about the Scientology episode, Isaac Hayes, the voice of Chef and a Scientologist himself, left the show. Last week, the opener for the new season showed the return of Chef, but with mangled dialogue. It appeared the South Park creators clipped together dialogue from past shows to make Chef sound like a pedophile. Then at the end, they killed Chef. You bastards! The South Park kids blame the “fruity little club” for turning Chef against them. Episode ends with Star Wars 3 motif in which Chef becomes Darth Chef…or whatever.

Now the reason why I’m so impressed. Hollywood is crazy. Hollywood is full of nutjobs. Matt Stone even talks in a 60 Minutes interview about how Hollywood actors think they’re so important when in fact it’s just plain silly how they talk. I agree…Hollywood is completely out of touch with America and reality to some respect. Scientology commands a great deal of respect in Hollywood. Some of your favorite stars are Scientologists, or into Kabbala. In fact, you could say saying anything against Scientology in Hollywood is akin to career suicide. But when you’re Matt Stone and Trey Parker, it becomes a dare. And it’s a dare they’ve taken. And not without support…fans of South Park are boycotting MI3 in protest over the censorship of the imfanous episode that started all this. I agree on two grounds: 1) it’s about time somebody took on those Scientology bastards and 2) I think it’s reprehensible how the Mission:Impossible television show was morphed into this Tom Cruise ego-fest that has nothing to do with the original series. It’s just another BAD remake. Worse…it’s a sequel to a sequel to a BAD remake.

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I was “surfin’ the net” the other day — specifically Craigslist — and came across SEVERAL postings advertising dating sites. Now most of us are aware of, but were you aware of the plethora of out there? The following is a short list of some of the tastier gems from cyberspace:

For those non-committal, coffee-achiever types.

Now women can date the same way they go to the bathroom!

I guess was already taken. I’ll leave this one to the imagination.

I guess going to a concert is out of the question.

Is that a 10-gallon hat or are you just happy to see me? Wait, don’t answer that.

Yes, girls! When having a man on a tight leash just isn’t enough.

Yes, guys! It’s the plot of 30% of all softcore porn films come to life! Here, you want them to drop the soap.

One thing I don’t get: “Huge Package” isn’t listed as one of the body types.

I can imagine some very weird 3-ways here. Then again, no…I’d rather not.

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